Getting back to myself (If I ever really knew who she was)

How does one center themselves? Get back to their fucking happy place? Feel content?  I'm struggling with this. Always have. With my life essentially being half over, it has been striking me that there is no better time than now to figure this out. Is this my mid-life crisis? Does everyone feel this way?

38 years old and not a clue where to start, but I’m going to start trying things that challenge me.  And, well, make me smile. Specifically, beading and making jewelry. I know, I know, that reminds you of this:

But I’m actually being dead serious.

When looking for a "self management" topic for a work meeting (long story...), I came across the concept of "flow".

…Finding Flow contends that we often walk through our days unaware and out of touch with our emotional lives. Our inattention makes us constantly bounce between two extremes: during much of the day we live filled with the anxiety and pressures of our work and obligations, while during our leisure moments, we tend to live in passive boredom. The key, according to Csikszentmihalyi, is to challenge ourselves with tasks requiring a high degree of skill and commitment. Instead of watching television, play the piano. Transform a routine task by taking a different approach. In short, learn the joy of complete engagement. Though they appear simple, the lessons in Finding Flow are life-altering.

The quote above is about a book is called Finding Flow: The Psychology of Engagement with Everyday Life by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi.  I have not read this yet (put it in the queue!), but the idea seems pretty simple.  Get lost in doing something creative, and most importantly, something you love and crave to know more about.  I’ve been trying really hard to incorporate this into my life. Make it worth waking up for. Is it working? Well I still can't be 100% sure, but one thing I do know....I have shit-tons of jewelry.